Finally couldn't take it anymore.. Finally couldn't hold back anymore... Finally can't hide it anymore.. Tried super hard to hold back my tears in school, on the bus ride home, and on the walk home...but they just can't help but flow uncontrollably.. Thinking of the the stress from different groups, and after so much tries, it's super difficult to keep up the front.. I'm really tired of having to hide an optimistic and determined front in front of everyone.. I'm obviously sad, but I'm acting as if nothing happened... It's really quite sad that there's no one there when I really needed it at that instance.. and it's not once, but many many times... Having to hide my feelings really sucked.. But I know that's the only way and only thing I can do... I don't want to stress others with my problems... I don't want to add on additional guilt to myself.. Having to bear and put up with lots of things, but I can't say, cause I know what people will say.. It's always the same old things that they say... Really very tired and sad about everything... Really can't hold out anymore... Life is just so unfair.. maybe I really didn't work hard enough? Maybe I'm just plain stupid.. I don't know.. Maybe I have to say goodbye to my dream... I hate the impact of these..
To YOU: I really want to be happy for you, but I can't bring myself to do it...I can't tell you all these cause I don't want to stress you further or anything...
