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RELIEVED!
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
woohoo! MY APPEAL WAS SUCCESSFUL! THANK YOU EVERYONE! HUI YAN TAKE CARE K! SORRY for making you come down and wait for me when you're sick! SORRY! But I really felt as if I had been released from jail man! DAMN FREAKING HAPPY!!! ok.I'll update tomorrow.Damn tired now.AFter all the travelling.What and eventful day man.
Lord, Thank You for allowing me to get back into JJ, I really pray now that I will be able to go econs rather than geog.Thank you Lord!!!
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9:33 PM
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Will the outcome be whatever I want?
Monday, February 25, 2008
I rather kill myself than go back there.Thats How I'll describe how much i dread going there.It's definitely different from the time I went Fairfield the first time, NOT KNOWING anyone at all! I realise I've no mood to study, and all I can think of is, how to pon, how to get out ASAP! And I totally don't feel like committing to anything at all! Not even excited about Overseas Trip like I always do.I'm always looking at the watch! Wondering why time passes by so slowly man.And starting to hate myself for making such a decision, with so much opinions from people.
Today was really hoping and hoping and hoping that I'll get a call from JJ.Even thought of going down to find the principal.Almost cried when the thought of not being able to find the principal if i was too late kept running through my mind.And madam Koh didn't reply me at all the whole day till the time I left School.I rushed down immediately after lesson man.Almost got caught in the rain, but luckily I walked real fast.So fast that I had muscle cramp.Was so worried, that I started calling people up to check if the principal was still in school.At the same time, since Robin and Tuck Yan told me to meet them,asked them to help me call the school.Robin called, and they said if I don't receive call by tues, means I didn't get in.But robin didn't managed to check for me.So he got Tuck to call, and Tuck Yan posed as my brother.I heard the things he said were quite funny.But well, really wanna thank them.Coz At least Tuck Yan's call was quite productive?They checked mine and told him that they were already processing mine alr.Told Evina that, she said means I got in.But still, I don't dare to hold my hopes high at all.Coz the greater hope you have, the greater disappointment I'll get in the end.Not only that, while I was on the train to Jurong, I finally received the call from mdm koh! She told the office people to check for my name, to see if it was under successful appeals, she told them I got 12, and my name wasn't there.But that wasn't my score lah.Even so, I alr felt tears in my eyes.But As usual, the brave and die die also want face shu held back everything in the MRT.Then I felt that it was no point going back JJ after hearing what Tuck Yan said,but in the end, we cabbed down for robin's sake.It was like 4.45? And appeals to JJ closes at 5? Robin totally chionged down the taxi, with me paying the fare 1st.LOL.Luckily he managed to appeal.PHEW! After that I was contemplating if I should ask again since Im in school, but I didn't dare after so many people asking for me.I paiseh.Tommy even offered to go GO with me, but I changed my mind.Even thought of talking to the principal man.But, changed my mind also.Haiz.Im such a coward at certain things that are so important to me.What a failure I am man.Well, Im left with tomorrow.Really REally REAlly REALly REALLy REALLY hoping that I'll get a call from JJ.I know I'm being unfair to SA.But still, I can't help it.HAIZ.I don't know how will I react if I got a call or if I don't.But I know, if I really don't, I will definitely be crying like mad.1st time, other than that time.HAIZ.
I really don't want to hear anymore "just change your thinking and stay in SA.Things will be better." I'm really getting irritated by that.I don't mind swopping my placing with anyone! People who knows my character should know that if I being such an adaptable person, can't even adapt or like a place after a few days, means I really won't like it, despite changing my thinking.
Thanks to those who have been there.Thanks hui yan, Qiao Yi, zi hui, ren wei, ces, evina, eduard, allicia, Tommy, Robin Choo, may, kenneth, darren, gary, miss yao,my GB Juniors and so on for your encouragement.Too many.Come to think of it.I really miss OG 12.The enthu-ness we haD.Zi Hui planning OG outings.Ren Wei and his caring and his whatever-that-is-good(He asked me to type these.JK Lah! It's quite true actually.)Shi Hao Raymond their crap and so on so forth.No one can replace OG 12 man.No one in the OG can be replaced.Missed 08S03 badly too.Missed the teasings of that few people, missed the mass ponning, the jokes, the fun time we had in the different subject classes, the stupid stuffs we did.One of my best Class ever! Really wanna go back there! Even the person that I don't really like doesn't seem so detestable now. My Beloved OG 12! The class that rocked forever! -08S03!! Schools along dover...From fairfield, to ACS I, to New TOwn, To Nan Hua in 08S03!
Haha! this was taken on valentine's day! Look how gay ren wei is! haha! I bet the balloon was ren wei's best present man! He didn't even know I put the balloon by the side! haha!
Lord, I really pray and hope that I'll be able to get out of SA and go JJ.Please Grant me my wish!!
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7:50 PM
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ARGH! This is SO irritating!!!
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Haiz...I really wonder what are my chances.I don't want to spend 2 yrs travelling 1 hour 10 mins to feel sad for don't know how many hours.REALLY!!! Please! Let me get out of there!!!
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7:00 PM
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Frustrations....
Haiz.I can't stop emo-ing man.I guess I have no right to say Ren Wei for always emo-ing.I can't stop wondering why I didn't get into my 4th choice or 5th choice? Maybe I would have been happier? I don't give a damn about whether that school is good for studying a not.I came to realise that a school is good for studying cause it's what others say so.My own theory is that if I'm happy, I will want to study and do well.Unlike now, wanted to study, but totally no mood for that.I know it will affect me sooner or later, but I really can't do it man.I tried, but really don't feel like studying.HAIZ.I've been so stupid to just listen to what others say.Now the uncertainty is back and I may have to regret makin that mistake, which sucks! And I know you people have been telling me not to think about the past.But at the state I'm in now, I can't stop thinking about it.You people are not in my shoes, so you have no right to ask me to change my thinking and what-so-ever I guess.I'm really getting damn pissed and frustrated, esp. at YOU.It's all your fault!!!! ARGH!
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11:53 AM
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In a Dilemma...Sadness Over Me..
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Well, apparently, it doesn't turn out to what I thought or hoped it will be.From I'm ok, to, I really hate it.I feel so out there,Unfriendly people, no common topic.So little fairsians that I hardly get to meet,stepping in with the "I want to cry" feeling, damn hard to tell jokes,Dread the 1 hour 10 mins travelling time now totally! I held back all my tears on the 1st day, and the moment i left there, The feeling went off. Feels so different! Hate it! Beginning to miss my first month.Even if i don't like the school, or that particular person, still, it's so much better! Heck with my ego character man! Heck with me being so conscious of what others think of me man.What an idiot I was, Putting that as my choice when I don't know anything about it at all.Haix! I just hopes my either appeal is successful! Please! I really wanna spend less than 1 hour travelling time to feel happier! If not, it'll really be quite hard to see the smile on SHU'S FACE. And shu will so so so be an introvert.
Erm.Let me see, orientation was one day? Went to school with May, and we were late.But since first day, so it was alright.The whole day was like mainly talk, other than a bit of mass dance, icebreakers, the great saintsational race that my group people were like walking? and finally ended off with a live band concert.It was quite funny dancing with joseph. cause he kept on getting the wrong hand.Then after that day, lectures start.
Hmm, on friday, went to help out in the sec 1 orientation camp after going to JJ to submit my appeal form.It's quite fun scaring and playing with them, esp. when im not planning anything.HAHA! They got scared and started screaming when they saw me sitting there in the dark.haha! But someone just spoilt it by turning on the lights.haha! Then woke up early today unreluctantly, coz reached home at 12 midnight last night, to go fairfield again.To help out.haha! Joined the girls in playing, totally looked so childish,and I totally behaved in a very stupid way lah.But nvm lah, as long as the sec 1s enjoy and love GB, I dont mind! Haha!
I hope I get out soon.Maybe I may regret it in future, maybe I'll like it when the classes are out, but those are just "MAYBEs".Now, i really don't feel happy there.Can't expect myself to go school everyday trying to hold back my tears? I can't.Though its the same situation as going fairfield in sec one, but it just feels so much so much more different.So, I really hope either school accepts me!!! PLEASE!!!!HAIZ.
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10:07 PM
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Worries
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
haiz.Im like having 2nd thoughts now.Why am I always like that man.I really don't know leh.AC seems like barely possible, Then I just heard from Hiong Yong that JJ have the subject combinations I want for JAE already.Like WHAT THE HECK! If I had known earlier, I would have put there alr.And I can save time travelling and stuffs. I was like perfectly ok with SA.Till I started thinking of other stuffs.Which is the only worry.Like when I got a CCA, will I be too tired to do homework or study after all the travelling and stuffs.Distance is really not a problem.HAIZ.I really don't know already.Well, forget it, Im gonna go sleep alr.Hopefully I won't get insomnia..
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9:46 PM
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Mixed Feelings...
hmm..Damn tired now.Got woke up by my loud message tone. Woke up and saw the message from MOE. Congratulating me that I got into SA.HAHA! I was like feeling so blur..and just glancing through, till I saw SA.WOAH! Totally jumped! I can't believe I really got in! Everyone's telling me SA AC a bit hard ah.And I thought I'll go like CJ JJ PJ.So, Im damn surprised!But well, now I don't know if I want to appeal to AC now.Sian.I think I'll just appeal, and if it isn't successful, I will just go SA lor.But of course, for AC, I got Car in the morning.And another reason lor.Yup.In any case, think I'll go AC then see how lor.
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8:04 AM
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Sunday, February 17, 2008
HAHA! I felt like a housewife.Did some last minute cleaning just now.Cause my relatives are coming to visit! LOL.My house is always the last, because my mum is the youngest in her family.The 14th CHILD! Cool right!!!
And PAE period is gonna come to an END REAL SOON. We're gonna get our posting results soon! It's just so contradicting, like how I initially felt that The posting results were too slow And now that It's really here, I don't really wanna get it.I don't know why.haiz.Been really worrying too much about things lately.Because I've been hearing many different things too! And I even felt that Im changing man.Well, change topic.
Talk about thursday 1st:-
Valentines' day: I felt that things will be different this year, since we are celebrating with a different group of people, with different school cultures.And I was right.Even other fairsians in other institutes felt the same way. Well, my class was as usual, funny and lame. Daniel Sim was so bad man.say ******* until like that.haha! Bio was just laughing session.And Hiong Yong was like deciding if he should go for bio. And he came up with a lot of funny reasons for not going.Like "If I don't go home and sleep, I'll feel guilty." haha! In the end, he went when mr Er said that he will only take 1 hour.After school, while waiting for the other OG mates to end lesson, me and qiao yi decided to get Ren Wei a helium balloon, and we did.With the help of daniel and kuei der, we got Ren Wei a heart shape balloon with the words :To:Ren Wei.Love you forever darling.Muackx! From: Gay Darling.Lol.He was so embarassed and I heard that he hugged the balloon home for fear that others will see it.Sorry ren wei!!! After went JEC with some OG mates to watch "Ah Long Pte Ltd".Damn gay and lame.but not too bad lah.After that was dinner, and after dinner we sat outside JE MRT station to talk.But most horror.LOL.
Saturday:
Hmm..My brother's and JIn Han's birthday.Went to KBOX Klunch with my cousins to celebrate my brother's birthday.And Kang Lu was damn lame.Purposely chose all the old songs to sing man.Damn lame.HAHA! And we sang "cai hong" 3 times, with KL rapping it 3 times too! The food was quite cold and tastes abit weird.But still edible lah.After that went Xue Wen's house.Bought a blackforest cake and celebrated for my brother.Then after that, we began to play mahjong! LOL.I finally know how to play "tai"! And xue wen finally know how to play mahjong.It's what we gonna play next time when we are old man.haha! Prevents one from becoming senile.LOL.After that went to meet Wilson Robin and Allicia at Bukit Batok to go Jacon's house for steamboat.It was real great catching up with everybody.As usual, the sick stuffs and lame stuffs came out. Of course, played mahjong too.And lo hei too! BUt the things they say were like "diao".HAHA! Everybody laughed like siao.After that, brought out the cake while Jacon switched off the lights.BUt the wind was so anti-climax.the moment the cake got out of the kitchen, the candles went off and OBVIOUSLY yiling saw it.But well, glad that she like it.
Ok.Better go off and start preparing already...haha! Be BACK SOON!!!
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10:53 AM
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Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Hmm..today's the 7th day of Chinese New Year, so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEOPLE!! LOL.
Hmm..Nothing much today.I guess the main highlight will be the lao yu sheng with class part.The yu sheng was the smallest I ever saw, and it looks and taste different too! Tommy was real funny, I mean the things he say and his aggressiveness.HAHA! We were like the centre of attraction man. And as usual, madam koh was like asking people to see her again.hAIZ.Don't know why.I'm getting SO TIRED nowadays.I just feel like sleeping.Im not the only one.Many others too.But the thing is, I don't even know why am I feeling so tired?
Oh,.I forgot to say that I met the same transvesite at Jurong Point again the 3rd time already! Still the same.Like OMG~Still the same man.No change! STyled his hair somemore.LOL.
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9:09 PM
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Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Shall talk about yesterday 1st..Was so freaking tired though I drank chicken essence in the morning, but wanted to sleep in all the tutorials.Super TIRED,guess is due to sleeping at 2plus 3 the night b4 after all the tossing and turnings for 2 hours.But after school,went to watch Kung Fu Dunk with Jacon and Jocelyn Thong at JP.HAHA! Totally became energised! Love the show man! Jay Chou's damn funny. It so fit his character lah! It's not too bad lah.Though I think maybe Secret is nicer.But still, I like kungfu dunk.Don't mind watching it again.It's like JAY CHOU! lol.haha! Then went home, went online a while, and slept at 7.45pM!!! I woke up at LIKE 5.30am today? Went school with wilson, like after don't how long he nvr come school. Mainly maths PC bio prac and GP today?ANd this morning was so funny,madam koh told us to stay back after assembly and told us some stuffs that apparently none of us understood.LOL.She's really very funny.I think I'll miss her.HAHA! Quite glad about my maths test results.Thought there were carelessness and it was an easy paper. Bio prac.As usual, few people went.But Mr Er was really nice.Dismissed us at 2plus.After we finished the eXperiment.Guessed he knows that we are all tired and dreaded staying back.After that, had a great talk with jocelyn thong, or rather, she was just listening to my story before going IMM with her to meet Jessica.
HAIZ.I don't know.Been having many sleepless nights of tossing and turning for don't know how many hours before I really fall asleep.And All those in my mind that keep me awake is the same THING! Like why can't they just get out of my mind? I'm just so pissed off each time I think about those stuff.Why must mine be in the middle? It's really getting irritating just listening to the "aiya, sure cannot make it", which links me to something else that pisses me off the MOST.It's not like I want it ? Why must I be the one suffering when I didn't even do anything? I didn't even start it? But somehow the bad person seems to be me? And I'm getting all the bad stuffs? Maybe I should never have bothered right from the start.Maybe my brain and my mind will be so much relaxed now. I won't have to think so much, waste so much and have so many sleepless nights.I really hate it!!! I guess it's time for a change.I should stop thinking about consequences and possiblities of things when everything just go out the other way.
-A volcano's gonna erupt soon if it doesn't get relieved of her stress over some stuffs....HAHA!
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7:24 PM
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Sunday, February 10, 2008
Finally I changed my blogskin! After don't know searching for how freaking long! To one that internet explorer can view.But still, this is just temporary blogskin.I will change it into a nicer one when I got time.Sian.I still prefer the falling leaves one.But nvm lah,Pooh is not bad! LOL.Ok.Shall continue my blogging tml.Damn tired alr.After 4 days of house-visiting! SO, ya.
Lastly, HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!
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11:39 PM
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BORED
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Hmm..It's like Chinese New Year's Eve? But I'm like so sian here at my auntie's house.I should have went home when my parents told us to go home just now, but like what can I do right? Watch TV? Use Com? I don't know.Actually felt like going to watch fireworks.But like Can't think of anyone to ask.Everyone should be all having their reunion dinner with their relatives like what I just had?
Today is like...erm..I don't know how to describe.Woke up abit later then usual, at 6.30. But actually I didn't set alarm the night before.So actually, if my daniel nvr msg me, I would have missed school and slept all the way.Well, guess I'm fated to go JJ today.LOL.Met max at 7 under his block and took his dad's car to JJ.Thanks Max! Hmm.Gathered at the canteen with the other fairsians as usual for a while b4 moving to gather for morning assembly.After morning assembly was like the New Year Program? I have nothing to say about it.Left halfway through mass dance with cui fen.Met Joel and Tai who left a little earlier us, in the canteen.Then we started calling all the fairsians to leave.In the end, we finally left JJ at 9.05 like that with all the waiting and the bus that came so slow. It felt great going back fairfield somehow.Saw the teachers and had a great time talking to them.But sadly, couldn't wait for the rest to come back school, had to go off.To buy MACS breakfast for my mum and brother.It was like I reached Clementi MACS at 10.50? PHEW! There was NO queue! Hurry bought what I wanted and went home.The train was so slow! Plus the walking, when i reached home, the breakfast turned soggy alr.At least A Bit. Then went to my Dad's 1st brother's house for reunion lunch.Woah! Shi Hui is so old alr! lol.My 1st uncle was so nice! He asked to do everything for us.I felt so bad.He even chased me away when I was helping him wash dishes. But the feeling he gave me is so different. He kept on saying that he's old and blah blah blah.I also don't know how to describe how I felt.I realised that my dad and his brothers have somehow changed a little after my grandma's death last year.HAIZ. After my dad's brother's house, My whole family went my mum's 7th sister's house.In case you don't know.My mum has 13 siblings,and she's the youngest.Yup. I was so full lah.Cos I only had lunch at 2plus 3 plus? then I had to have dinner at 5plus? and my auntie just kept asking me to eat.I feel so bloated now lah. Then after that, is like I'm using my cousin's com? My parents playing mahjong,My cousin playing winning 1 on PS 2.LOL.I think i'll go play that later.Yup.
Well...I haven't really decided whether I want it a not.But I think I'll just take it since my dad wants it so much.I can't tell, though he doesn't say...But well, Maybe it's a good choice.I should just take it i guess.
Anyway, all these are old stuffs, so since it's the new year, We shall all forget our unhappiness and start afresh! haha! so, HAPPY NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE PEOPLE! I shall go think about my CHINESE new year resolution.Just found out from my parents that I'm actually 19 from the chinese calendar, though I was supposed to be 18! haha! But of course, I'm still 17 on the english calendar.I wonder if the chinese calendar counts for movie? haha! LOL..
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8:40 PM
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Random
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Ok..Back blogging..Been a week? Shall just talk about the more interesting stuffs.
First one will be 08S03 class outing to bowling and Fish&Co. Bowling was real funny. Isham was the last few in the 1st round, but he ended up becoming the best 2 in the next 2 rounds! And Aravindhan was funny too.He was like zham-ing the floor! Whacked the ball so hard! Then trained down to Plaza Singapura To meet the rest at Glass House.Tommy Cheng met us later..and He was damn funny lah.Spoke to the waiter in an Indian tone.LOL.And he was like shouting for his swordfish collar that was a damn huge serving.And As usual, Daniel En Ping Joel Goh followed him to the toilet to strip him? haha! Whether they did it a not, I don't know.And Chee Yew ordered a damn big cup of drink.Forgot what was it.And as we continued eating, the rest started to look at the menu and saw weird and horny stuffs.HAHA! Damn lame lah.After that, left with Joel for 4E'07 BBQ.Caleb and Jing Ming were like cam-whoring and they were damn funny.Cui Fen and KD were like so busy with the BBQ stuffs.And Joel got so pissed cause he had to leave with the BB guys the moment he reached.Well, Just caught up with the rest.
Tuesday went to watch 27 dresses again with evina jasmine michelle.Quite A lame but nice show actually.Saw Chen Han Wei at cine.We were eating halfway at Koba when michelle suddenly said "that looks like chen han wei".We turned and we said "that IS chen han wei".It was quite funny.There were this 2 girls who were walking back and forth just to see him.LOL.
Then Saturday.Yeah man! Finally got to go shopping for new year clothes.But was like muscle aching everywhere.Went town with Li Ping and Xin nee.So glad that I got what I needed and wanted, if not If anyone were to ask me go out, I will just die.
Haiz.I really don't know if I should just choose it.I want to, but I also don't want. And I don't understand why sometimes people are just so straight-forward, can't they just lie to make others feel better?Or can't they just say things behind other's back? At least it's a white lie? Or the person who heard about it won't feel so inferior or upset.It may be impossible, but still, no harm trying? Rather than standing there and let others crush their confidence?
To OG12: I'm so sorry.It seems like I haven't been spending time with you guys, But really, I'm getting broke.And have been spending too much recently.I have to save up my monthly allowance also..
To 08S03: Haiz.The time we have as a class is so little! I'm really gonna miss the times we had making fun of you-know-who, and talking rubbish.Talking crap during bio, and mass pon-ning lessons. And thinking about what is large and thinking of how chocolate milk is made..LOL.
Finally, yes! I'm so glad that it's been 3 years! LOL.
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1:07 PM
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